National Margarita Day? And Other Strange Holidays to Skip Work For in February
In only 28 days, the shortest month of the year packs in the greatest number of outrageous holidays; basically, an excuse for us to pop champagne and bring out dessert every night.
We’re all well-acquainted with Black History Month, or even Valentine’s Day, with its foreboding reminder of spending another night Netflix-and-chilling alone. But have you ever heard of Singles Awareness Day (Feb 15)?! Or how about National Drink Wine Day (Feb 18), which conveniently leaves you with a hangover just in time for National Margarita Day (Feb 22). Oh - and just in case your headache wasn’t bad enough - stock up for Open That Bottle Night (Feb 23). It might be the month of love, but February is also a revolution for all the single ladies.
But forget love - what about those who conquered that ages ago? Remember Grandma Betty? Well, she’s still got the spirit of a 20-year-old and the courage of a lioness. Lucky for her, February’s the Month of Spunky Old Broads, defined as “fun, butt-kicking women over the age of 50 who simply refuse to sit back quietly.” This month, buy grandma a motorcycle! Take her to a club! It’s her time to relive college days, in a new era of selfies and Ariana Grande.
Speaking of selfies, it’s a good thing Be Humble Day (Feb 22) still exists, because I was beginning to think social media might have eaten up any remnants of modesty. With a feed covered in Sam’s immaculate vacation to Hawaii, or Brenda’s new tan, or Julia’s ‘relaxing’ day sipping tea, Get A Different Name Day (Feb 13) might be the best way to shake up your profile - or try your hand at Tinder. ‘Alex Jones’ from NYC, we know you’re really just a 13-year-old boy…
And here are a few of my remaining favorites from February’s strange selection of holidays: Wave All Your Fingers at Your Neighbor Day (Feb 7 - but what fingers?), Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk Day (Feb 11), and my personal favorite, Public Sleeping Day (Feb 28).
So here you have it. 28 holidays, and 28 perfect excuses to skip work for the entire month of February. Take it or leave it, we’ll just put this here.